We ate bread today for lunch.
It was just another week day for the Humboldt park community – a place full of colorful store fronts, the whoosh of passing cars, and the Latin culture. But there we were- five females on a picnic table on the edge of the side walk. Before us on our stone spread was a loaf of bread, a tiny jar of peanut butter and one large, unripe orange. Yep. This was lunch.
Early in the day Krista (one of the staff members of Radical Journey) had given us a challenge. Each person was to be given a dollar for lunch. Yes just one dollar. I could already image how loud my stomach would growl by 3 o’clock. Five dollars for five people? It was not going to be easy. (It wasn’t). It was not going to be good (it wasn’t) but it ended up being enough – amazingly enough.
While my group was eating lunch, I told Rose that it felt like we found a way to “re-do” communion as we passed around the jar of peanut butter and dipped our bread into, hands sticky with the juice from the fruit. I don’t mean this in a sacrilegious type of way. But when I literally break bread with a community, it’s hard to stop the Lord’s Supper from coming to mind. Breaking the crusty bread couldn’t help but remind me of the realities that are beyond my own perspective. Part of being “broken and poured out for others” is understanding. I never have to worry about not getting enough to eat. I never have to wonder if what we have will be enough for everyone. I never stop to think what the reality of not having enough would be like day after miserable day.
It was humbling – sitting on the streets of Humboldt Park in the cold, eating on dollar each, and learning, in a new way, how to be grateful. And in many ways, it was more than enough.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Wet and Rainy
It was a wet and rainy day. I woke up this morning to a gloomy flat and a little bit of my own disappointment. Why? Today was the day we were going out into the city. and it was raining. "Oh boy," I thought, "if this weather keeps up all day... it's going to be a long day..."
Around 11 am, I found myself with a group of girls intensely studying the cta and Chicago maps. As the other groups left and headed out to their assigned destinations we took over the porch, planning out our general destinations and what train or bus to take to get there. It was a little bit overwhelming, especially when the Chicago map was about 5x5 feet. (Well, I am being overly dramatic but it was awful especially when we out and about trying to fold this beast of a map. No wonder tourists always look like fools. They are given huge maps that might as well at as a giant target or a sign that says "um, I'm not from here and I have no idea what I am doing). Eventually we figured out what to do and headed towards the El (Wilson red line).
Although we did have some confusion about directions, made a few mistakes, got a few blisters we found everything we were supposed to. My group of girls (Devon, Ashley, Rose, and Gabby) worked well together and I am really grateful. When we got lost, we did not let it stress us out and we still were able to laugh and smile about things thought the trek, which, of course, is the most important part. It was good to be downtown some today too. It helps me remember why I like this city.
But the weather did meet up with us again at the very end of our journey back to the Friendly towers. And by that I mean it poured. and I mean POURED. oh well. It's all a part of the adventure I guess.
Confession: A bunch of us are in the Dollop, which is a coffee shop in uptown. A few of us were here yesterday. Yep. Apparently this is going to be a habit.
Around 11 am, I found myself with a group of girls intensely studying the cta and Chicago maps. As the other groups left and headed out to their assigned destinations we took over the porch, planning out our general destinations and what train or bus to take to get there. It was a little bit overwhelming, especially when the Chicago map was about 5x5 feet. (Well, I am being overly dramatic but it was awful especially when we out and about trying to fold this beast of a map. No wonder tourists always look like fools. They are given huge maps that might as well at as a giant target or a sign that says "um, I'm not from here and I have no idea what I am doing). Eventually we figured out what to do and headed towards the El (Wilson red line).
Although we did have some confusion about directions, made a few mistakes, got a few blisters we found everything we were supposed to. My group of girls (Devon, Ashley, Rose, and Gabby) worked well together and I am really grateful. When we got lost, we did not let it stress us out and we still were able to laugh and smile about things thought the trek, which, of course, is the most important part. It was good to be downtown some today too. It helps me remember why I like this city.
But the weather did meet up with us again at the very end of our journey back to the Friendly towers. And by that I mean it poured. and I mean POURED. oh well. It's all a part of the adventure I guess.
Confession: A bunch of us are in the Dollop, which is a coffee shop in uptown. A few of us were here yesterday. Yep. Apparently this is going to be a habit.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
New places, new faces
Week one of Chicago.
I am not exactly how to effectively put into words what things have been like so far. Overwhelming is the only word that keeps coming to mind. Meeting a ton of new people (and having no personal space - seriously no one can even unpack their suitcase which unfortunately stresses me out every single time I open mine) is completely (and I do mean that in very dramatic way) exhausting. In a group of new people I cannot help but feel completely lost in the group, especially as someone who has a quieter personality.
We took personality tests yesterday and it turns out that I tied of a "perfectionist" and a "romantic." A romantic perfectionist sounds awful. or a lot to handle. No wonder I have a hard time dealing with myself :-) It's been pretty eye opening though.
Today we shared our "faith stories" in our country groups and one of my teammates mentioned to me after I was done telling mine (crying the whole time of course) how he believes that I been giving the gift of empathy, which I think is true (though it's always helpful for someone to see that "writing on the wall" and affirm that to me). But also is rather, well, depressing and feels more like a burden than an actual gift. It's hard to be completely unbalanced with it comes to my emotions but I don't want to lose that side of me either. I need my heart to break for others in order to motivate me to want to do something. If I don't hurt, I won't move. But at this same time, I feel trapped by this because I feel pain for people but can't seem to cross the threshold between knowledge and action. I am hoping that this journey helps me bridge that gap (and helps me balance my emotions).
It's going to be long journey.
I am not exactly how to effectively put into words what things have been like so far. Overwhelming is the only word that keeps coming to mind. Meeting a ton of new people (and having no personal space - seriously no one can even unpack their suitcase which unfortunately stresses me out every single time I open mine) is completely (and I do mean that in very dramatic way) exhausting. In a group of new people I cannot help but feel completely lost in the group, especially as someone who has a quieter personality.
We took personality tests yesterday and it turns out that I tied of a "perfectionist" and a "romantic." A romantic perfectionist sounds awful. or a lot to handle. No wonder I have a hard time dealing with myself :-) It's been pretty eye opening though.
Today we shared our "faith stories" in our country groups and one of my teammates mentioned to me after I was done telling mine (crying the whole time of course) how he believes that I been giving the gift of empathy, which I think is true (though it's always helpful for someone to see that "writing on the wall" and affirm that to me). But also is rather, well, depressing and feels more like a burden than an actual gift. It's hard to be completely unbalanced with it comes to my emotions but I don't want to lose that side of me either. I need my heart to break for others in order to motivate me to want to do something. If I don't hurt, I won't move. But at this same time, I feel trapped by this because I feel pain for people but can't seem to cross the threshold between knowledge and action. I am hoping that this journey helps me bridge that gap (and helps me balance my emotions).
It's going to be long journey.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
The day before the beginning...
it's a rather hard job to pack your life into a suitcase, a duffel bag, and one over sized (and overly stuffed) purse. I've been rather proud of myself actually. I managed to pack with only one major break down (although I seriously doubt my ability to carry my collect of stuff for longer than 30 seconds).
Although I officially declared myself done packing the night before I left Asheville NC to go to Morton IL, I found myself spending my last evening repacking. Aaron and Janice had an larger suitcase that they weren't using. So although I am not bringing anymore stuff than what was tightly compacted into my own suitcase, it doesn't appear to be the case. My new suitcase (still red) is massive. No wonder airlines started cashing in on suitcase weight. I am sure that someone could easily stuff 100 pounds into this suitcase. ridiculous. No worries though, I only have 51 pounds. (and it will magically only be 50 pounds when I weigh in at the airport. somehow...)
I leave for Chicago tomorrow and as of 2pm Radical Journey will officially be underway. As I sit here tonight, on the eve of summer's end, I can't help but feel sad. Don't get me wrong, I am excited to be a part of Radical journey. But I realized today that the next time I see my niece, she'll be 1 1/2 years old. Meaning, she will be walking and maybe talking. Although there will be a lot of differences when I get back, Mikaela represents that the most to me right now and all that I will be missing.
But I can't get stuck on that. It's been a good summer and after 7,399 miles of traveling that took place in the past 4 months I am ready to add a "few" more.
So here's to the next phase of life.
Although I officially declared myself done packing the night before I left Asheville NC to go to Morton IL, I found myself spending my last evening repacking. Aaron and Janice had an larger suitcase that they weren't using. So although I am not bringing anymore stuff than what was tightly compacted into my own suitcase, it doesn't appear to be the case. My new suitcase (still red) is massive. No wonder airlines started cashing in on suitcase weight. I am sure that someone could easily stuff 100 pounds into this suitcase. ridiculous. No worries though, I only have 51 pounds. (and it will magically only be 50 pounds when I weigh in at the airport. somehow...)
I leave for Chicago tomorrow and as of 2pm Radical Journey will officially be underway. As I sit here tonight, on the eve of summer's end, I can't help but feel sad. Don't get me wrong, I am excited to be a part of Radical journey. But I realized today that the next time I see my niece, she'll be 1 1/2 years old. Meaning, she will be walking and maybe talking. Although there will be a lot of differences when I get back, Mikaela represents that the most to me right now and all that I will be missing.
But I can't get stuck on that. It's been a good summer and after 7,399 miles of traveling that took place in the past 4 months I am ready to add a "few" more.
So here's to the next phase of life.
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